Do your best ideas get ignored? Does your input get the brush-off from co-workers and friends? Here are 5 ways to start getting taken seriously.
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Thanks for watching!
Hey, it’s Marie Forleo.
And you are watching MarieTV, the place to be to create a business and life.
You love so much.
And today it’s Q&A Tuesday.
Today’s question, comes from E., and she writes: “Hello, Marie, I hope.
This message finds, you well.
My question, is, how do I effectively get my point across to others and have it taken? Seriously? It seems as though I’m speaking Greek or something., I, send emails, I speak up in meetings, and I’m ignored.
Intention is to provide solutions to problems with innovative ideas in order to reach and/or exceed goals.
This is not just in my work life.
But also in my personal life., It’s frustrating that I can’t get through to those I care.
I would love to hear your perspective., Sincerely, E.”, Great, question, E., So, let’s start off by recognizing that there’s two categories here: things.
You can control and things you can’t.
In, the camp of things you can’t.
You have to recognize that no matter how brilliant your ideas are.
There’s always gonna be some people who just have no interest in hearing about them.
This is true for both in your work life.
And in your personal life., So, it doesn't matter how great your ideas are or how wonderful of a communicator you are.
You cannot make someone listen to your ideas if they’re just not interested.
Now, let’s move on to the more fun.
We can control.
Like it or not.
We all have communication patterns that undermine our power and authority.
I have them too and I’m always trying to keep an eye out to form better habits because making some small tweaks in the way that we communicate can make a world of difference in making sure that we are taken seriously.
While this list isn’t exhaustive, it’ll really help.
You become a more powerful and persuasive communicator.
One is don't use too many fancy words.
It obscures your message, and it also weakens the chance that you’re going to be understood and taken seriously.
Here’s, an example.
Individuals, consciously recognize it when you are attempting in an overly strenuous way, by utilizing complex verbiage, to impress upon them that you are intelligent and/or sophisticated., In other words, people know when you're trying too hard to sound smart.
You, even danced on the edge of it a little bit in your question, when you wrote, “My intention is to provide solutions to problems with innovative ideas in order to reach and/or exceed, goals.” Right there.
You went from sounding like a totally relatable human being to sounding like a business robot.
So when in doubt, use simple words and get right to the point.
Two is lose the dumb disclaimer.
You know, this one, right? We all start off a sentence by saying, “Well.
This might be dumb but…”.
Or, “This might be silly.
But…”, or, “This might be way off base, but…” Basically.
We use the dumb disclaimer any time that we’re not sure about what we’re about to say or as a preemptive move.
If we think that other people aren’t gonna like it.
We figure if we call it dumb before anyone else does, the rejection will hurt less.
The truth is, all that disclaimer does is undercut your power.
So stop doing it.
You wanna try something neutral.
Like, “How about this idea?” or, “What about this?”.
Number three is turn “yea but” into “yes, and.”, It’s, a natural habit when any of us hear something, we disagree.
And then we wanna add our perspective.
What we think is right, to say, “Yeah, but…” But.
You have to realize this:.
Anything that’s followed by a, but is gonna kick up someone else’s defences, whether you’re in your personal life or in a creative meeting., For, example, “I think that’s a good idea, but…”, or, “I, love hanging out with you, but…” Listen to how different it sounds.
When you say, “I think that’s a good idea, and…” as in, “I think that’s a good idea.
And here’s another perspective.” Or, “I, love hanging out with you, and I think we’d have even more fun.
Of course, if you strongly disagree with something, then just disagree.
If you haven’t been invited to offer your opinions and you're really trying to get a seat at the table, using “yes and” can help you get your ideas.
Number, four is be a knocker.
So before you bust through that door with your big, innovative ideas.
It’s a good idea to give a little knock knock.
And here’s how you do it.
You, ask someone, are you open to a suggestion for this? Or? Would you like to hear an idea? What? This does is get the other person intrigued and makes them feel like they’ve invited your feedback rather than getting bulldozed over by you.
And all your innovation.
So don't, be a bulldozer, be a knocker, because everybody loves knockers.
Number 5 is follow-up.
If you share an idea with the team or you send out a proposal, make sure you follow-up.
Most, people are so busy, I know, I am, and I’m so grateful when people take the initiative and move things ahead.
When you do follow-up, don't be mousey about it and don't say, anything like this:.
“Dear Sam, I’m.
So sorry to bother.
You - I’m sure you’re so busy.
By chance, have you had a moment to take a look at what I sent you?, If, not, no worries.
But if it’s not too much trouble, I’d, love, your feedback.
I think it’s possibly a very innovative solution.” Instead.
You can try something direct and clear like this:.
I’m following up on the proposal.
I sent you last week on a strategy for our social media.
In case, you missed it, I’m attaching it again and I’d be happy to walk you through it., I know, it’s been an ongoing challenge for us and I, really think this could solve it.
I’d love to see if you agree.
If, there’s a better time to follow up.
Let me know and I’ll circle back then.”, So there you have it E., 5 solid strategies to help you achieve this tweetable.
And you’ll be taken seriously.
That was my A to your Q, E., I, really hope.
Now I would love to hear from you.
You ever struggled to be taken seriously?, If, so, what specific change in your communication or approach made the biggest impact? Tell me in the comments, below.
The best discussions happen after the episode over at MarieForleo.com.
So make sure you go there and leave a comment now.
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And, if you want even more resources to create a business and life that you love, plus some personal insights from me that I only talk about in the email, come on over to MarieForleo.com and sign up for email, updates.
Stay on your game and keep going for your dreams because the world needs that special gift that only you have.
Thank you so much for watching and I’ll catch you next time on MarieTV.
When someone doesn't take you seriously, it means that they don't believe or value what you are saying or doing.How do you know if someone doesn't take you seriously? ›
- They told you they weren't interested in something serious.
- You're clearly not their priority.
- They've deliberately never introduced you to their friends or family.
- They refuse to talk about the future.
When someone doesn't take you seriously, it means that they don't believe or value what you are saying or doing.What is something you don't take seriously? ›
facetious / factious / fatuous. The word facetious describes something you don't take seriously.What makes people not to take you serious? ›
People won't take you seriously if you don't assert yourself, your ideas, and what you want to happen. If they can easily boss you around and control you, they won't think you can take charge of your business properly, and they likely won't listen when you tell them what they should be doing.How do I get someone to take me seriously? ›
- Always be informed. ...
- Add value. ...
- Be truthful and genuine. ...
- Keep your word. ...
- Be clear and concise. ...
- Stand for success. ...
- Be relatable. ...
- Dress well.
- Passive aggressive behavior. ...
- Volatility. ...
- "Jokes" that aren't really jokes. ...
- Walking on eggshells. ...
- You feel like you have to ask permission. ...
- Constant exhaustion. ...
- Becoming isolated.
- Your needs aren't being met.
- You're seeking those needs from others.
- You're scared to ask for more from your partner.
- Your friends and family don't support your relationship.
- You feel obligated to stay with your partner.
- They make you feel bad about yourself. ...
- They have you second-guessing their feelings toward you. ...
- They don't listen to you. ...
- They don't support your goals. ...
- They pressure you to get physical before you're ready. ...
- The relationship is all about them.
When you don't leave room for fun and won't let go of your problems, you miss out on the living part of life. By not taking life so seriously, you open yourself up to a life of deeper fulfillment and less stress.
officious. adjective. showing disapproval showing an annoying tendency to take your position or status too seriously.What's another word for don't take things seriously? ›
On this page you'll find 22 synonyms, antonyms, and words related to not be serious, such as: dally, dilly-dally, idle, monkey, play, and trifle.What is an example of take serious? ›
He takes his religious faith seriously. She's well qualified for the job, so she hopes the company will take her seriously. His parents threatened to punish him, but he didn't take them seriously, since he had not been punished before.Why do I take little things so seriously? ›
If you tend to take things personally when they are not personal, it is because something has hit a nerve. You are projecting your own doubts and insecurities on other people. You expect people to dislike what you don't like about yourself. You expect them to doubt your ability to do things that intimidate you.How can I be serious in everything? ›
- Avoid making eye contact with people around you. Fold your arms and cross your legs.
- Stay quiet and maintain a serious expression.
- You do not stay in this pose permanently. You only need to hold it until you work through your thoughts. Holding it too long may look awkward.
Why do I avoid people? You might avoid people that you know because you prefer your own company, you don't know how to make small talk, or you're scared of feeling vulnerable or exposed around others. Some people are also restricted by mood disorders, shyness, or previous negative experiences.What causes people to treat others badly? ›
For most of us, hurting others causes us to feel their pain. And we don't like this feeling. This suggests two reasons people may harm the harmless – either they don't feel the others' pain or they enjoy feeling the others' pain. Another reason people harm the harmless is because they nonetheless see a threat.How do you get people to value you? ›
- Give respect to other people. Justin Sullivan/Getty Images. ...
- Consistently keep your promises. Flickr / reynermedia. ...
- Let your actions speak louder than your words. ...
- Help others when they need it. ...
- Ask for help when you need it. ...
- Say what you mean. ...
- Always strive to do better. ...
- Admit to your mistakes.
- Be clear: adopt an honest and direct communication style. ...
- Use the golden rule: treat your partner the way you want to be treated. ...
- Reflect to others: treat yourself with respect. ...
- Use reinforcement: show appreciation for behaviors you like from your partner.
- Starting with yourself. ...
- Setting your 'rules of engagement' ...
- Communicating clearly and empathetically. ...
- Modeling behavior. ...
- Reinforcing what you like. ...
- Picking a role model to emulate. ...
- Keeping it real.
Being taken for granted typically means that someone does not appreciate all the things you do for them. They may take you for granted because they think you will always be there for them, or they may simply not care.What is a big red flag in a guy? ›
Red flags in a guy or girl can be signs of narcissism, aggression, victimization, or even abusive behavior. By becoming aware of some common red flags, you can avoid getting involved in a toxic relationship.When should you not give up? ›
- You haven't achieved your goal.
- You have already come so far.
- Self-doubt is common.
- Success is always difficult.
- Uncertainty is where extraordinary happens.
- Failures are important.
- Pain is inevitable.
- No regrets.
What are major red flags? Some red flags can be sorted out with conversation and therapy. However, some should never be tolerated. Major red flags are infidelity, gaslighting, controlling behavior, angry outbursts, and physical, sexual, or emotional abuse.What are green flags in a person? ›
“A green flag is when a potential partner is considerate and aware of your boundaries, asks for clarification on them when they are unclear, and does not push them,” she says. Let's say you ask to meet at a bar or the park on the first date and have expressed that you're more comfortable meeting in public places.How do you tell if someone doesn't want you around? ›
- #1 You Put in Most of the Effort.
- #2 They Actively Avoid Connecting Deeply with You.
- #3 They don't ask about you.
- #4 They Stop Reaching Out or Making Plans.
- #5 They Regularly Cancel Plans.
- #6 They Make Excuses.
- #7 They're Always Busy.
- #8 They Don't Respond or Lack Enthusiasm in Responses.
Being too serious can come from catastrophic thinking, or fearfulness. For some, it comes from being (perhaps unknowingly) on guard. What if you say the wrong thing or hurt someone's feelings? You cope with worry and concerns and fears by having a serious view of life and what could go wrong.Why take life so seriously nobody makes it out alive? ›
“Don't take life seriously. Either way, you won't make it out alive,” quote from Alphonse Allais. — This formula full of wisdom is often attributed to the wonderful humorist, Henri Jeanson's compatriot, Alphonse Allais.Is being a serious person good or bad? ›
In matters of personal professional performance and job and applicant selection, “serious” is generally considered to be a generally good thing—unless the job is clown or court jester. Across the gamut of jobs and in one way or another, having a “serious” attitude is taken very seriously.What type of people take things personally? ›
People with low self-esteem sometimes worry too much about what others think. They may very well take things too personally. Anxiety disorders. Those who have social anxiety are extremely afraid of being judged and embarrassed.
When someone takes things personally, this usually means that they feel as though they're under attack. They may feel as though their character, abilities, competence, or personal achievements are in question and may start to get defensive as a result. People usually take things personally if something hits a nerve.How do you deal with someone who takes everything personally? ›
- First, make sure you communicate clearly. ...
- Second, know yourself, your worth, and pay attention to your emotional reactions. ...
- Third, ask yourself if you want to be right or if you want to be happy. ...
- But wait!
On this page you'll find 48 synonyms, antonyms, and words related to nonserious, such as: foolish, idiotic, impractical, petty, pointless, and senseless.What is the word for lack of seriousness? ›
[ friv-uh-luhs ] show ipa. See synonyms for: frivolousfrivolouslyfrivolousness on Thesaurus.com. adjective. characterized by lack of seriousness or sense: frivolous conduct.What is the act of being serious? ›
Seriousness (noun; adjective: serious) is an attitude of gravity, solemnity, persistence, and earnestness toward something considered to be of importance. Some notable philosophers and commentators have criticised excessive seriousness, while others have praised it.What is an example of serious person? ›
A serious person is quiet, thinks carefully about things, and does not laugh a lot: I remember her as a very serious child. I thought she was joking but she was deadly serious.What is the quality of being serious? ›
Seriousness is a quality of being calmly intent, or serious. Your seriousness will serve you well when you're studying for an important test. You might talk about the seriousness of an argument between two friends, or the seriousness of your math teacher when she expects the class to pay attention.What does it mean to be too personal? ›
What do people do who are Too Personal? People who are Too Personal ask questions and make comments about you, your body and your personal life which are, quite frankly, none of their business. They overstep the boundary of good taste and ask questions and make comments which are way too familiar.Why do people worry about little things? ›
Occasional anxiety is a normal part of life. Many people may worry about things such as health, money, or family problems. But people with GAD feel extremely worried or nervous more frequently about these and other things—even when there is little or no reason to worry about them.Why do small things matter to me? ›
Small actions make up our attitude and behavior. Small things grow and are more efficient over time. The little things we overlook build up to the big ones. The little things we do are actually the memories our families and friends have of us.
- Treat your body with respect. Eat well, and get plenty of exercise and sleep.
- Keep friends who value you, get rid of people who don't.
A serious person is quiet, thinks carefully about things, and does not laugh a lot: I remember her as a very serious child. More examples. I thought she was joking but she was deadly serious.Should you be serious in life? ›
Seriousness should be there as per the weight of the situation. You are the best judge to decide the weight of every problem or obstacle you have to overcome. An overemphasis on seriousness in life lends itself to a narrow way of understanding what's worth your time and attention.How do you deal with someone who doesn't treat you well? ›
- Ask yourself first.
- Address your issues.
- Set your boundaries and be firm with it.
- Don't blame yourself.
- Don't let it happen again.
- Don't be afraid to seek help.
- Understand what abuse is.
If you tend to take things personally when they are not personal, it is because something has hit a nerve. You are projecting your own doubts and insecurities on other people. You expect people to dislike what you don't like about yourself. You expect them to doubt your ability to do things that intimidate you.Why do some people take life too seriously? ›
“When we're stressed, we tend to take life too seriously,” Wolkin explains. “If we're chronically stressed, we're at risk for mental health challenges, high blood pressure, and so on. Try taking a nature walk, engage in a mindfulness practice, or start journaling.”How do you get over someone not worth it? ›
- Grieving is the first step of the process. ...
- Put someone else on speed dial. ...
- Structure your days. ...
- Put extra focus on self-care. ...
- Take a step up in your next relationship. ...
- Get excited for your future. ...
- Purge your pictures (and your social media), but don't act rashly.
They turn the story around to make it seem like you are at fault, deflecting attention and blame away from them to make you feel guilty. This type of emotional manipulation is called gaslighting.How do you tell if someone is using you? ›
- The person asks you for money, favors, or other items. ...
- The person imposes on you without consideration for your availability or preferences. ...
- The person expects you to take care of their needs. ...
- The person appears disinterested in you after their needs have been met.